149) "How did you know you were trans?" Part 3 - The Subtle Importance of Walking
Walking was highly instrumental in one of the first key ‘breakthroughs’ that I ever made in therapy. I remember the session well. My therapist was asking me to go into my memories and find a time in my childhood when I would say I felt really, deeply secure and strong in myself.
I sat there for quite a while.
148) "How did you know you were trans?" Part 2 - The Invisible Girl
I can swear, I can joke
I say what’s on my mind
If I drink, if I smoke
I keep up with the guys
And you see me holding up my middle finger to the world
Fuck your ribbons and your pearls
‘Cause I’m not just a pretty girl
147) "How did you know you were trans?" Part 1 - Escape from Alcatraz
What IS downright fascinating about this though, is HOW a person who has lived for all those years with a certain understanding, then comes to realize a whole different understanding (which they feel is the truth), about themselves!
It’s like, instead of asking how someone ended up in jail, ask them how they escaped! What was their “Get Out of Jail Free” card?
There is a deep lesson in here that goes far beyond being trans gender or cis gender or whatever else. It gets down to the foundation of what it means to feel like we are Somebody at all.
146) Clara Dolderman: My coming out story
People who are in transition, or who are questioning their gender and trying to figure themselves out, really need acceptance, because let me tell you, the more that your social world threatens to reject you, the WAY harder this ends up being for the person. They need to accept themselves, because it’s Who They Are. And it sure is a lot harder to accept and love yourself, if the people around you don’t.
145) Coming Full Circle: Part 5 — The Bleeding Hearts and The Artists Make Their Stand
There’s no sense pretending we are not in this situation, just like there’s no sense in a budding sapling pretending it didn’t germinate in poor soil, if that’s the reality.
No, that sapling has to grow those roots deeper, and proliferate its root system so thoroughly that it gets the life energy it needs to survive and thrive. Right there, in the poor soil it was planted it. Or, it dies.
144) Coming Full Circle: Part 4 — My Personal Piece of Performance Art
It’s not ideas that will make the difference, so much as it’s people connecting to their gentle, and passionate, animal hearts, their sensuous flesh, their mortal vulnerability.
How many of us, truly, have dug down into our guts and done the deep, soul-work necessary to heal our wounds and fill our hearts with love for our neighbours?
143) Coming Full Circle: Part 3 — Screaming into the Void
I know I might be screaming into the void here. But we have to talk about this. We have to change it. How the hell can we face the future, and look in the eyes of tomorrow’s children, unless we can at the very least say, “I really tried to do what I could”?
142) Coming Full Circle: Part 2 -- Ancient Dreams in a Modern Land
From the perspective of “how can humans manage their societies on this planet?”, the best understanding that we now collectively have, is, in essence, the common wisdom that is shared among indigenous cultures.
141) Coming Full Circle: Part 1 — Me, this blog, Pink, and a Scathing Diatribe against The System, maaaan
I feel really, really grateful for you all. All the people who have been reading this and sharing thoughts, a whole community of people who share ideas on Facebook especially and in comments here — it’s just awesome to have experienced all this. Blogging is (for me anyway, lol….) a pretty personal thing, like writing into your diary….but then for some ungodly reason sharing it with the world.
140) Wow…weird. I healed: Part 4 - Backlash (or, as my therapist likes to say, "Shame is a tricky bastard")
If you are on a path of healing, you are also on a path of backlash. It’ll happen, and when it does, it’s VERY HELPFUL to remember, it’s ok; it’s just a backlash; keep going.
139) Wow…weird. I healed: Part 3 - The Spontaneous, Seemingly-Magical Transformation of Motivation
Keep in mind, the “self help industry” is an INDUSTRY. It, decidedly, does NOT thrive on wellness, but ironically, on illness. Nothing quite as good for the bottom line than repeat customers!
138) Wow…weird. I healed: Part 2 -- The Self-Fulfilling Prophecy of Self-Improvement
Keeping an open mind & heart is one of the most fundamental necessities of a healthy life, and of wisdom in general. It seems terribly difficult for people, especially some people, to do this, to accept the uncertainty of opening to new ways of thinking, or to appreciate values, lifestyles, beliefs, that are different from their own.
137) Wow…weird. I healed: Part 1: The struggle and the miracle
Do you struggle with this feeling, like you “can’t” share positive things about yourself? Do you know where it comes from? Because that’s a pretty good place to start if you want to get through it, and eventually be free from it
136) From Shitty-ness to Well-ness, Part 15: FACT Exercise #2 -- Choosing Meaning over Control
If you feel shitty, that’s ok. I mean, it’s not exactly great, like yay, yippee, I feel shitty! No, but its “ok” in the sense that feeling shitty is just part of life. It’s inevitable.
But we have more strength than we are so often willing to tap into. If we HAVE TO, we can overcome those shitty feelings. At least for a while. At least for long enough to get some Really Important Things done.
135) From Shitty-ness to Well-ness, Part 14: FACT Exercise #1 -- Focusing
The thing about telescopes (and microscopes, and binoculars), is that you can’t see shit out of them until you get them aimed and focused properly. Before you do that, they’re actually worse than your naked eyes; everything is just a blur and you have no idea what you’re looking at.
Self-healing and personal growth are exactly like that. Until you know what you’re aiming at, and focus yourself properly, you’re not going to get anywhere by “trying to improve”. You might even get worse, because there’s nothing quite like failing, for someone who struggles not to feel like a failure.
134) From Shitty-ness to Well-ness, Part 13: Avoiding the Shit
The only thing we really get better at by avoiding our problems, is avoiding our problems. We become Level 10 Shit Avoiders. Our defence mechanisms, fantasy thinking, distractions and other “coping strategies” become our super-powers. Pretty shitty super-powers, eh? No wonder Marvel and DC don’t have movies about Avoidance Man fighting bad guys….
133) From Shitty-ness to Well-ness, Part 12: You are strong enough
If it’s been hard to read this, I’m sorry. But if it’s the truth, then it’s the truth.
This can change. You are strong enough. Your ancestors made sure of that.
132) From Shitty-ness to Well-ness, Part 11: FACT cares about your feelings
This is about YOU, living the way your heart most deeply desires. It’s about YOU finding your life more meaningful. It’s about learning to intuitively connect with that which makes your heart sing. And if you’re doing THAT, then who cares how much someone else has accomplished?
131) Stranger Things, Part 5: Some wee critiques, and a suggestion; or Why Is Henry so Damn Evil???
The biggest unexplored ‘hole’ in the show, which would be SO COOL to unpack, is why Henry is so evil in the first place. Like, he’s a mega-scale psycho, right from when he was a kid. Are we just supposed to assume he was born that way? Victor Kreel talks about him being “sensitive”, and so, it seems we are either supposed to assume he was genetically psychotic, or that his sensitive nature caused him to get possessed by the demonic power in the Upside Down? Either are, of course, possible, but not very satisfying.
130) Stranger Things, Part 4: How the Great Evil will be defeated
So, how will the Great Evil finally be defeated? How will the heroes possibly prevail, as Hell gets unleashed on Earth?
Dustin! One more drum roll, please…